Big Moving Day.

Today was moving day at ZHOP. I was there for about 9 hours, while others were there for even longer. It took a lot to move from such a big building, to the small place we have now. We were moving stuff to storage, houses, trash, and the new building, and of course cleaning in order to leave the place extra nice for the ministry that is moving in after us. I'm not going to lie, last night I was not looking forward to the big moving day today. I didn't have a good attitude about it, and even this morning the start to my morning didn't go as planned. I woke up late, barely had time to eat, and got there half an hour later than I was supposed to. It was so great though. The minute I walked into the building there was joy and peace in my heart. The whole day was so delightful even in all the labor we had to do, blisters, and aching feet and muscles. A lot of people have been called to other places in the last half year, it feels as though the ministry is losing ground, a lot of funding has been cut out, and everything is changing, but today I realized that its not really about what it looks like. Its all about the people and the heart of the Lord in all this. My favorite moment of the whole day was watching the curtains being taken down from around the stage with the director of the internship I went through while there was still an acoustic set going on. I believe it was a set up from the Lord for me to be standing right where I was as they tore it apart. All of what we do here was brought to my eyes in that one to two minutes. It was so sobering to watch all of the commotion of the movement of boxes and furniture and stuff from other rooms being brought through the prayer room with no chairs and no people, and the stage being torn down while there was still worship and praise ever lifting before the Father, the throne that we cannot see in the natural. There was something so surreal about all of this. It wasn't about the fact that there was a set going on during the move, but a symbol to me of how eternal this is. I realized we're all still in this, together, and its all about the Lord and what He is doing in us. Nothing can take it from us. He is the Rock that is higher than I, and He's got something planned that we can't even see right now, and that cannot be shaken or waver. I couldn't help but just stand there and watch, and smile, and give thanks for being able to be a part of something so real, and for all of what we have in just a guitar strum and vocal chords singing scripture back to the Lord. There is something so solid about it, unchanging, and eternal. There is a mighty work going on. Even if someone were to take our instruments, they couldn't take the new song He's put in our mouths. There is a confidence I have that is inexplainable, and a value I have in this specific part of the journey we, as ZHOP, are on right now. I'm excited and curious to see exactly what the Lord is doing in the midst of us. It really isn't about where we are, the number we are, or what words we have to say. Its all about Him, and His will, and a flame in our hearts set ablaze by His word and His love that cause us to be in unity with Him.

We're living for another country that is to come. (Hebrews 11)

...Onto the next season...

What We're Praying For.

Some friends and I rode the light rail into Uptown Charlotte tonight right after leaving a meeting of zealous people mingling together and sharing testimonies of what the Lord is doing. Something was different than the last time I rode. It was like my eyes were completely opened to every single person riding. You know how sometimes someone sticks out to you that you know is dealing with something, and you want to be there for them, have the right words for them, hug them, love them, and see them okay again before you leave? Well, it was like that, but it was everyone. It was crazy, overwhelming, and kind of scary. It seemed like everyone who hopped on and off of the light rail was just weighed down, oppressed, unsatisfied, hopeless, and just plain burnt out by life. I could almost literally see it in everyone. There was no expression of joy, rest, praise, thankfulness, hope, or satisfaction even in a smile or laugh that was heard. I couldn't help but pray a lot of the time in silence for every face I saw. It sounds so cliche and "sunday school", but it made me want more than I used to enjoy when going into the "big and exciting" city for the night away, or more than just me and the people I'm with to walk the city and enjoy it. I couldn't even think about what I wanted. Instead of wanting to explore the area on my time off and goof off, I wanted nothing more than the people to know the heart of their Creator, behind the clouds and dreariness of what is seen. I wanted to see the whole place completely transformed by perfect love instead of find a new art museum, retro coffee shop, or sweet clothing store. Its not enjoyable when the ones we meet aren't walking in joy and rest and experiencing the love of the Father. Even now as I write this the desire is still here inside of me to see it happen. What would it be like to go to Uptown and not feel like we stopped hearing testimonies and stopped encountering the joy and rest and love through others that can only come from the throne room; and, not for our sake, but for the sake of others who cross paths with them, and for Jesus' name and power of love to truly be shown. Would that be "the fullness"? Would that be a city transformed and carrying "the face of Christ"? Would He, and us, be able to rest because there was no more transformation that was needed? I guess that's what we're here praying for...hmph...anyways, all in all the bustling streets that once fascinated me with all the options of diversity from my normal lifestyle at my feet didn't seem so satisfying anymore; all I wanted to do was just find a simple place to recruit to and sit and enjoy the company of those I had come with in order to find rest. Eventually, thankfully, another friend drove into Uptown and met us, and we ended up going to a new area of Charlotte, so we didn't ride the rail back. As we were driving back we approached a storm the closer we got to home. It was a beautiful and glorious way to end the night with the natural dancing light beams of explosive power revealing the sillouettes of clouds hidden by the fallen night. I'd say it far outdid the light rail in all of its wonder, hints, and provoking appeal for greater things. It was a sweet gift from the Lord to let me fall back and rest in the knowledge of His beauty that still exists around us. And the hope that comes from that for this city.

Even now, I'm listening to soft roles of thunder. Wonderful.

G'nite.

Bliss.

"Only to sit and think of God,

Oh what a joy it is!

To think the thought,

To breathe the Name,

Earth has no higher bliss."

-Fredrick W. Faber

Brilliant, Blinding Conforming Process.

Because the eternal Himself longs to dwell in fullness, the shackles are undergoing the first stages of breaking. Sudden daylight is winking through a breathing hole pierced by the weight of truth in order to flow in divine, factual dreams and visions giving way and life to the holy scriptures which will cause the darkness, that was given rise by the "wise" but immature in earth's theology and ideas, to be overwhelmed and become extinct. After a current, needed, and perfect delay a pure, sincere wholehearted being will be brought forth in an exceptional, electric glow. She's in store for the finale of life delegated by mortals holding power, weak as it is, as she'll join in unison, on count, with the words spoken in rhythm of the King's heart. A holy nation will become one with the Holy. All this once regarded as unlikely to happen according to the undeveloped, uninformed, unbelieving mass of minds. They've been forced to be stationed in imagination and misguided into the way of falsehood by the gravity of the condition and appearance of that which we recognize as the only share there is to this life. Hopelessness, the faithless, and embracing momentary delight have become a blockade between reality beyond the eye's perspective and the paved streets we laid for our feet to walk on, which was actually always meant to be the rock, or the Word. Which, being rooted and grounded as a tree in a tender loving covenant's promise through ink and pages binded together is way more concrete than that which we are capable of developing with our hands and knowledge. Senses are opening to allow the face intended from everlasting to convey that which has been exempt by man's own created will. Direct, intense influence from the everlasting is traveling in for the order placed regarding the transformation in store for hearts to comply with His authority in the time that is transporting out of the frame we have placed it in. Faithful ones becoming a substance as they hold an unforgettable instance of eternity's breath in the repeats section of their collecting mind. Its God's gift in allowing a sneak peak through what's beyond this box our fleshly forefathers have placed us in and what we hardly know better than to teach the generation that comes after us. We must remember works of old, encounters, testimonys, and swim in the rays of light coming through the breathing hole letting it cause life to burst from the inside of us and pierce through all the darkness around us. Its called partnership, or submitting. By allowing it to become a part of us and letting it interfere with our surroundings by the inexplicable, fascinating, form of reflection. That's a double portion of glory. Its not necessary for the God of all creation to talk to us in the first place, but the fact that His words, or even just a single word, can change the atmosphere if we permit the leeway. Let there be no restraint for the Spirit to do His work. Let there be no hindrances to join in.

All creation will groan, along with the eternal, will cry out in one voice for the just and righteous Judge, JESUS CHRIST, to reign in all authority on the earth forever. This is truth. (Romans 8:19-27) (Revelation 19)(Revelation 22:17)(All of Revelation 22)

Until then we are subjected to a brilliant, blinding conforming process by grace, mercy, and blessing.

Euphoric in all it's pain.

ZHOP Update

There are a lot of changes going on with ZHOP. Suddenly. No wonder God's been talking to me about faith so much lately.

In a stream of a month or so there has been a few major announcements. On May 30 we were told we would be moving from 24/7 prayer and worship to 12 hours a day in order to "strengthen what was left". A lot of our strong worship leaders over the last 6 months have been called to other places so there were very few left who were equipped to fill their spots, and a lot of those left, like myself, who couldn't just be thrown into a spot on stage and know what to do in order to lead a whole team, if there were enough people available to make a team. There is also so much more to this place than the music and prayer room, although it is the root, that needed people to be trained in order to continue on. There are several departments and things for the city that ZHOP carries. So the older ones needed resting time, I guess you could say, and we needed time to be brought into a place that we could do this too. Now, that doesn't mean we all aren't still living a lifestyle of 24/7 prayer but only that we closed the door to ZHOP for a short season after 8pm and opened it at 8am, in order to consolidate everyone, build community, and strengthen the staff.

The second announcement was that the senior directors of the house and 3 out of 4 of the vision team announced the day before yesterday, July 6, that they were all being called to move in August and December to other places by the Lord. We have a new director of the house, the one leftover from the vision team, and who foreran ZHOP 3 years before the 24/7 building opened.

Along with all of that, we are moving into a new building by the end of this month (July), due to the property we are on being bought out.

What does this mean for ZHOP? We keep going. Some may leave while the rest stay, but the house will keep fighting for 24/7 prayer and worship and ministry to the Lord and outreach to the city of Charlotte, as well as seeing a culture of life in America and through the nations, revival in Israel, Hannah's and Samuels, and other visions that have been put into place by God.

How am I dealing with all of this on a personal level, and what is the Lord leading me to do as it is a pivotal point for the house's staff? Well, the Lord put the question in my heart after Christmas whether or not to move back home in August, when I go home for my sister's wedding, which i didn't tell many about simply because i didn't want man's voice in it, but strictly the Lord's. I have asked more than I can count why August and not June, when my dad got married. It didn't make sense to me to come back to Charlotte for a month and a half. As this summer got closer, the question of whether to go home or not got more and more heavy on my heart. I didn't understand it. I knew it would be hard no matter whether the Lord told me to stay or go. Its been really hard being here as I miss and love my family so much, and hate being away while there are SO many things going on right now with them, but love ZHOP so much, and have never felt God so strongly here and felt so "called" to anything. I was completely torn. The time to go home for a visit in June was nearing and there was still no answer from the Lord, so I prayed extra hard knowing I needed an answer now, and knowing the Lord likes to wait until last minute to answer any question. That's how He works..."suddenly". I only had more and more guesses and ideas as to why I was supposed to go home but still no answer the week I was supposed to hop on the plane so I was frustrated knowing I would have to look for a place and job in Springfield while there if I were to move in August. I asked the Lord for definite signs that I was supposed to come back, and suddenly from the time I stepped into the airport to the plane ride home the Lord encountered me in so many different ways, intensely, and everything I asked the Lord to do, He did above and beyond what I had asked for. He blew my mind with the signs that I was supposed to come back and He spoke through several people as well. He confirmed my position here. So, long before these announcements even took place, the Lord put the question in my heart as to whether or not I was supposed to come back after my sister's wedding, answered that I was supposed to stay and was meant to be here after August. So as far as whether or not I am one to stay here or go, I am sure the Lord has told me to stay. Which I am thankful for. He was kind to put that question in me before this and answer it so I'm not in confusion during all the sudden turning direction and leadership of the Lord. Although in shock still as to the news, I know the Lord has us in His hand, a plan for this house, and is just doing some rewiring.

I had a dream last week sometime. In the dream I was talking about ZHOP to two men and the guy just started laughing at me and saying, "It looks like ZHOP is closing down". The thing is, in the dream, I knew that it was an attitude and perspective I had been forewarned about and was expecting to encounter as I continued in ministry at ZHOP so I just sat back and continued praying for this place and leaning on the Lord's word and not man's opinion. I didn't understand the dream when I woke up and as I've asked the Lord about it over the last week I was still confused, and really tried to ignore it, but after the meetings we've had over the last couple of days I now understand. It does look like ZHOP is closing and it is really the only thing that is expected in an outsider's view of the kingdom. I know that those words and types of perspectives are going to be thrown at us, we're going to be called crazy, and I don't disagree with what it looks like either. BUT, I know far more in my spirit than what the natural eye is seeing and what my flesh knows, and I will stand and live and believe and hope and fight for far more. Its not a time to listen to man's opinion (which includes what our very own flesh and mind's and heart's are telling us) or look at what's going on in the natural, but to trust in Him and what He is saying....to follow God and God alone.

Water Lilies In The Midst Of War.

First of all Happy late 4th of July to everyone. I spent the night with a bunch of friends in a parking lot watching fireworks from the baseball stadium in Charlotte while having loads of people all around, some playing country music loud enough from their stand points for us to hear. It felt a lot like some Missouri nights and made me smile upon the situation and feel like I was home. I hope everyone else had a marvelous holiday filled with lots of laughter and sweet memories, food, and things to blow up!

The Lord is still speaking to me about faith. Yesterday I was painting in the back of ZHOP while a lady was leading a set there. Her antiphonal cycle was out of Revelation 1:5a-"and from Jesus Christ, who is the faithful witness....". Not only is He one who saw the Father and was a witness to the faithful walk as His Son, because He walked it out Himself in the flesh as we are to do so, but He TESTIFIED only of His Father. Meaning, He said only what was true about the Father, He spoke only what He heard, He came only to do the Father's will, and He did only what He saw the Father doing. I never looked at it as a testifying walk. Only as one who viewed. Its goes along with letting the kingdom come down and arise on the inside of us to let the glory of the Lord and His presence be manifested on this earth. Its walking by faith. The walk of faith is a walk of testifying of what we hope for and are certain will come in the midst of trial.

I was at the art museum in Kansas City a couple of weeks ago and the lady I was with and I did an audio tour. I don't know if you've ever done this, but I suggest it! It was a lot of fun and so much easier to enjoy the paintings as the audio headphone set was played with explanations of the painting, as well as information and history. We got lost for 3 hours in that place and only went through like half of it! Anyway, I came across Monet's "Water Lilies", and of course, being a huge fan of his work as he played a huge role in the Impressionist Movement, I had to check out the audio. It said that most of his "water and lilly painting obsession" was done during World War 1 in his studio while he focused on the pond just outside his window while he worked on painting light's movement on water. As he painted there were bombs and gun shots going on in the distance. I couldn't help but imagine myself in the day and time while at the museum, and then again this week as there are tons of fireworks all around. I mean seriously, in the midst of a war, would I be able to be filled with such peace, joy, and contentment, by the Holy Spirit and the joy set before me, that I wouldn't be sitting, worrying, doubting, and in fear? Would I be able to bring the beauty of God into view and give glory to the Lord through artwork and song in the midst of war as a believer? Now, I don't know if Claude Monet was a Christian, although he has records of being baptized, but it made me think quite a bit for myself and other believers in this generation.

On a side note and completely off the subject, I have a couple prayer requests. Today is the first day of Camp David. We are going to have lots and lots of teens with us from all over the place for the next two weeks who are coming just for the Lord! And, tomorrow morning my nephew, Ryder Lee Bryant, is scheduled to be born by c-section (duno how to spell that). I am so zealous to pray for this as he has been diagnosed with Spina Bifida and Hydrocefelous. I am super bummed I can't be there myself, but am doing what I can and praying. A lot. Please join with me if you can and pray for Camp David and hearts to encounter God, and a safe delivery of my nephew. Thank you so much. God bless!

Faith Is A Substance.

The Lord and I went on a "walk/bike ride/find a spot to sit and talk for a while" today. We haven't had one of those in a while. At least 3 weeks. And with the new schedule, it doesn't look like we'll be having them as much as we used to. But today I got to. And the couple of hours was so sweet. He talked to me a lot about faith and listening.

Hebrews 12:2 is what He spoke in the beginning of our time. It says, "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."

First of all it says He is the author and perfecter of our faith. Meaning, He spoke it into existence and then perfected it, or finished it, in order that there may be no problem or need for improvement. Our faith is perfect, or eligible to be once obtained.

Second it says for the joy set before Him He endured the cross, scorning its shame. He rejected the shame and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God, the Father. In all the dishonor, in all the humiliation, in the unfortunate situation He chose joy instead of shame while walking by faith. While being put to death, He dismissed any feeling that the flesh was telling Him knowing what was to come, believing for it, and therefore walking in a higher way, joyfully, and calling on the Father at all times.

As I was reciting the Hebrews 12:2 verse the Lord just kept saying "substance". It says somewhere else in Hebrews that faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things unseen. He just kept saying, "Faith is the substance. Faith is a substance." What?? I mean, really? That means faith is tangible. Its within reach. A real physical matter. What is the substance? Its got to be something right here. Its got to be in us. Something very, very real inside of us. Something that's not questionable, something right before us that can not be doubted. At least for me. I know if I haven't experienced something for myself, then I don't believe in it, no matter what it is.

After speaking to me about substance the Lord then reminded me of a friend's video blog I watched yesterday. She was talking about the kingdom of God being in us. I've heard it a million times but it never really became real to me until now. I mean, the kingdom of God is in us. The joy that was set before Jesus, the very thing that He kept His eyes on while He was enduring such pain and the very thing that was so worthy for Him to go through the cross is in us.....she said, "let it arise, let the glory arise."

So, I'm having a hard time putting it all together, or I guess its just taking a while to sit in, even as I type this blog, but I think I'm starting to get maybe a very, very small, tiny bit of a fraction of what He was saying in all this. Or I guess what He was getting me to ask. "What does faith look like?" It looks like someone stepping out without seeing or knowing what will happen. The step is the substance that there is something worth stepping out for. Its the substance of something greater that will meet our hope. I mean without someone stepping out and telling another that they were going to pray for them and they will be healed, no one would be healed. And without missionaries stepping out in a lifestyle of "faith" in order to do the Lord's work, no one would see the Lord providing for anyone....or at least the provision for His glory. Without someone speaking something, in the name of Jesus, He would never be able to answer the prayer. I mean, it might happen just because the Lord is good, but He wouldn't be able to give it in response to a hope, or a belief, that He is good and would give or make happen if we just asked. How is the Lord going to encounter someone unless they are waiting, hoping, asking, believing for it?

There is a building of faith that occurs. For the person stepping out and the onlooker or person who experiences the outcome. Its almost like an addition problem and faith being the outcome. Faith is a substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things unseen. It can only be faith if the problem includes the Father's touch in bringing the outcome. Otherwise, its man's doing.

Faith is the substance of things hoped for. Faith is the evidence of things seen. So we must attain the hope, and then step out and act on it. And as He judges that which is not right, and brings the rising of of His power to bring the answer to the prayer and walk of faith, we will find joy and the Father in the end. This is why we endure the putting to death of the flesh and all the doubts, fears, and mind games it plays, because there is joy for others, there is joy for us, and most of all there is joy and glory due the King, the author and perfecter of our faith, who is the only reason we are able to walk this faith out. He finished it all already. We just have to listen and act and believe.

Faith is a substance. That's awesome.

Let the kingdom arise among the faithful ones.